Getting Away From It All
Two-hander · Comedy
Getting Away From It All
Getting Away From It All · Simon Law
1 / 1
Getting Away From It All
Published by scriptsandsketches.com
In a travel agency, an overly enthusiastic agent tries to find the perfect holiday for a customer who has seemingly done it all, leading to a comical realization.
Duologue
Characters: AGENT, CUSTOMER
(The scene is a Travel Agent’s Office)
AGENT:
Welcome to Morgan’s Round the World Travel. Can I help you? We find something for everyone. No one leaves here without a booking a great holiday.
CUSTOMER:
I was just looking at your brochures.
AGENT:
Pretty aren’t they? We try to cater for all needs. May I suggest a fortnight by the sea, medium priced hotel, plenty of tours - you’ll love the meals.
CUSTOMER:
Thank you. We did that 2003.
AGENT:
How about hiking in the mountains? You look the energetic type. Great for the heart and lungs. It will put years on your life.
CUSTOMER:
Provided you don’t fall off!
AGENT:
We employ guides who have climbed Everest.
CUSTOMER:
No. I climbed Everest in 2004.
AGENT:
K2?
CUSTOMER:
K2 in 2005.
AGENT:
A caravan holiday. Great for the whole family. Four berth and you can take it with you.
CUSTOMER:
I took it with me in 2006. I haven’t got over it yet.
AGENT:
You could do the lakes.
CUSTOMER:
Done the lakes.
AGENT:
Go to a remote island?
CUSTOMER:
Been there.
AGENT:
There are hundreds of them!
CUSTOMER:
I have a lot of holidays.
AGENT:
How about a cruise?
CUSTOMER:
Feel trapped.
AGENT:
Pot holing.
CUSTOMER:
Trapped!!
AGENT:
Self catering?
CUSTOMER:
Bored.
AGENT:
Dog walking.
CUSTOMER:
Haven’t got a dog.
AGENT:
I will get you the perfect holiday. I never fail.
CUSTOMER:
There’s nothing for me, is there?
AGENT:
There is somewhere for everyone. Where do you live?
CUSTOMER:
15, Paradise Close.
AGENT:
I know it. It’s by the Bay, overlooking the sea. It’s an old place.
CUSTOMER:
It’s been there for three centuries.
AGENT:
I’ve the perfect holiday for you.
CUSTOMER:
Really! I didn’t think you would find my anything..
AGENT:
Morgan’s Round the World Travel never gives in. I have found you an old country house …
CUSTOMER:
By the sea?
AGENT:
Yes. It’s by the sea.
CUSTOMER:
Tell me more. What’s the food like?
AGENT:
Do you like home cooking?
CUSTOMER:
Of course.
AGENT:
Just like home cooking.
CUSTOMER:
Entertainment?
AGENT:
Which are your favourite things at home?
CUSTOMER:
I like watching television and play a bit of golf. We have the Paradise golf course near us.
AGENT:
Great television and a golf course right on your doorstep.
CUSTOMER:
Sounds interesting. I assume we can come and go as we like?
AGENT:
What do you do at home?
CUSTOMER:
Come and go as I like, of course.
AGENT:
It will be exactly the same. You have your own front door key.
CUSTOMER:
I like that. I am really interested. I have a car. Can I get a hire car?
AGENT:
Your own model will be waiting for you.
CUSTOMER:
What about the children? Do you provide child care?
AGENT:
Who looks after your children?
CUSTOMER:
My husband usually.
AGENT:
Child care will be provided.
CUSTOMER:
I am not that keen on flying. I had a problem on a Jumbo Jet.
AGENT:
There is no flying involved.
CUSTOMER:
So it’s in this country?
AGENT:
Yes. It’s not far.
CUSTOMER:
This all sounds wonderful. How long can I stay?
AGENT:
As long as you wish.
CUSTOMER:
I’ll book a month.
AGENT:
That’ll be four thousand pounds. I accept credit cards. (Customer hands over card)
CUSTOMER:
That’s fine. I live in a good area
AGENT:
I know you do. All sorted.
CUSTOMER:
Congratulations. I didn’t think you’d find anywhere. You’ve done a really good job. Where am I staying?
AGENT:
It’s by a bay … by the sea.
CUSTOMER:
Yes. I like that.
AGENT:
Near a golf course. With home cooking and your own car.
CUSTOMER:
Yes … excellent.
AGENT:
Its number 15, Paradise Close.
CUSTOMER:
But I live at number 15, Paradise Close?
AGENT:
You have everything you need. Do come and book with us next year.
