Mother died when I was born. She was - she was a dancer. Father and I travelled about the country and had no fixed place to live in. You see, Miss Louisa, Father's a - clown! But sometimes the people wouldn't laugh and then Father cried. He is far far timider than they thought! Father said I was his comfort through everything - I used to read to him to cheer his courage and he was very fond of that. Often and often the stories made him forget all his troubles.
He was always, always kind to me. He was angry only one night, and that was not to me, but to Merrylegs. Merrylegs is his performing dog, Miss Louisa. One night, after the circus, Father asked Merrylegs to jump up on the backs of the two chairs and stand across them - it's one of his tricks.
He looked at Father and didn't do it once! Everything had gone wrong that night and Father hadn't pleased the public at all. He cried out that the very dog knew he was failing and had no pity on him.
Then he beat the dog and I was frightened and said: "Father, Father! Pray don't hurt the creature that is so fond of you! Heaven forgive you, Father, stop!" And he stopped, and the dog was bloody, and Father lay down crying on the floor, and the dog licked his face.
This is how it ended, Miss Louisa. I came home from school one day and found Father rocking himself by the fire as if he were in pain. The more I spoke to him, the more he hid his face and said nothing but 'My darling' and 'My love!' He sent me out to get some medicine for him and when I came back - he was gone! But I know he will come home one day. I keep the nine oils ready for him.